The Cornish Times received a letter from Tony Cottrell from Polruan, it said:
"Oh, the feud is, I’m told, more than centuries old
And it’s still nowadays quite intense
Though grockles don’t fuss about what bothers us,
For the locals the issue’s immense.-
Though some call ‘pastie’, a confection that’s quite nasty
There’s something that’s even worst
With a scone, it is treason
If, for some foolish reason
You don’t put the jam on it first.
At tea time it’s tradition, to follow one’s volition
And drink tea to quench one’s thirst
But if it’s scones that you’re after,
To escape the locals’ laughter
Oh you must put the jam on them first
Jam on first, Jam on first, oh you must put the jam on them first
Folk who are crazy try to cook up the star-gazy
Fish pie with tails reversed
But they won’t bat an eye-lid
If you just do as I did
Simply slam all the jam on it first
And so if a shopper
Wants to be right and proper
And not be for ever cursed
Just take this direction
And you will find perfection
That is, you put the jam on it first
Jam on First, jam on first, you must spread the jam on it first
So if you are choosing
An afternoon infusion
For which both your lips are pursed,
Be sure that your choice is
agreeing with our voices
Because locals will moan
If there’s cream on the scone
Oh you must spread the jam on it first."






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